Somewhere around three weeks before our wedding, I lost my mind.
If anyone’s seen it, I would very much like it back.
The last time I remember being okay was for Yay NY! The next week was so chock full of WEDDING the stress adrenaline obliterated any faint traces of a hangover.
And so it would be until October. (Because yes, our honeymoon was at least as stressful as the wedding, if not more so.)
The task-juggling was so bad that from waking till sleep I did not waste a breath on anything that wasn’t “productive”. I might as well have had my To Do lists tattooed on the inside of my eyelids.
It sounds awful but it felt like I was flying. I have never before gotten SO MUCH DONE. For once in my life I had a single clear cut purpose. WEDDING. Oh, and keeping the rest of my [our] lives afloat.
That was the hard part.
As the scales tipped more and more in favor of WEDDING, I started to get a wee bit absentminded about other things. I’d forget to pay a bill here or there. Things at work would fall between the cracks.
One night when I attempted to slow down for a moment, as we were watching TV a commercial came on and while I was staring at it, a million and one things running through my brain, I completely lost my mind.
I turned to Scott and asked him what show we were watching, because honest to god, I could not for the life of me remember back to a moment earlier. He thought I was kidding and began laughing at me, while I struggled to overcome the greatest brain fart in the history of my existence.
But I couldn’t remember. He had to tell me. It was terrifying.
I thought immediately after the wedding my mind would come back. I mean, ALL THE THINGS are off the calendar and the To Do list.
And then when this didn’t happen right away I figured it would just take a bit of adjustment.
Well now it’s January, and yesterday morning I flat out forgot about a dentist appointment until it was too late to go.
Scott said everyone does that kind of thing occasionally.
Not me. I’ve never done something like that in my life.
It’s been nearly four months.
I’d like my mind back.